This an autobiography of how I survived a narcissistic parent with homicidal tendencies and how it was a surreal reality I faced as I grew from a child into an adult, a mother, and then a wife.  A true story of how I was nearly killed more than once and survived. As small child who was often abused and neglected, later to become the source of all blame by her family. As an adult, I sought healing and understanding. Confusion led me down some painful roads as I did not have a healthy mentor to provide me with guidance and direction. Later in my life, my beloved family members were in the headlines of criminal intent which includes deception leading to homicide. A family member I loved was murdered and my spirit knew immediately who was to blame.